As Dorothy once said...

... there’s no place like home. You can always trust a girl who has great taste in sparkly shoes and a canine best friend, so wise words from that Kansas girl which I fully agree with.

Joy of joys we finally signed the lease and moved into our flat on Christmas Eve. The trauma of flat hunting finally came to an end. I never thought I would spend my Christmas Eve a) in Delhi b) finally unpacking after what has seemed 3 months of packing up my life to move here. I also never thought I would spend Christmas Eve hanging out with Bobby... now that’s another story.

So yes, our Delhi Des Res search is over. In order to get a pukka pad, we’ve cheated slightly in the sheer frustration of trying to find anywhere safe or decent so we are topping up our VSO allowance to pay the rent. It’s all character building, we are still doing hand washing (it’s a full workout trying to do a pair of jeans by hand believe me), when it gets to 45°c outside I think I’m going to appreciate the option of some air conditioning... so still keeping it real! Our flat is in a great part of town and we’ve nicknamed it the ‘Temple House’ as we are opposite two Hindu temples. The call to prayer and bells are rung twice a day which is very soothing.

The majority of flats come empty so once we had signed the lease we needed to move fast on the furniture front. That’s when we met Bobby. Ikea has not yet invaded India, so on a volunteer allowance it’s back to the old school fun of buying second hand furniture. Luckily there is a big online expat community, so when someone ‘shifts’ (the Hinglish term for moving house) back home there are plenty of house sales. Bobby was selling the contents of his house so off we trotted to his place as soon as the ink was dry on the lease. Bobby has been living between California and Delhi for the last 30 years and is kind of a Hindi Phil Spector (with the big hair, minus the murder rap). His accent is truly mesmerising and was keen to ply us with wine before perusing his furniture. He sorted us out with beds, two sofas and some tables for a not too shabby price and even arranged delivery the next day.

Our furniture arrived on Christmas Eve with Bobby in tow, to pick up the rest of his cash and a dinner invite. I think he got the impression we were two (ahem) young girls in need of a father figure. We politely played along, until we discovered he had a washing machine for sale. It’s truly cheating not to hand wash your clothes during your VSO placement. But, considering you need to shower 2-3 times a day to keep the sweat at bay from April, hand washing loses its novelty petty quickly. All that time you could be helping the fight against global poverty but instead you are scrubbing your smalls. I bet Bono doesn’t dunk his drawers in a bucket. We were putty in his hands. I think we will be going over there with a bottle of wine next week to secure the automatic top loader. It’s all for the cause...

Highlights: So many this week... attending a skills building workshop for blind teenage boys and watching my boss motivate and interact with everyone, home sweet home (a full night’s sleep sans ear plugs I never knew India could be this quiet), cooking my first meal in 7 weeks (Christmas breakfast was the best ever scrambled egg and smoked salmon... woops there goes the budget again), spending Christmas Day with 12 other volunteers and a brave friend visiting from the UK who embraced the VSO madness (the spread was unbelievable, even sprouts taste good in India and I’ve never seen such competitive charades), getting the best ever Christmas parcel from my darling sister (my she shops good – a cashmere jumper, truffles, hand cream and the complete Gavin & Stacey DVD boxset - feel free to send similar donations!), discovering the temple opposite the house does yoga three nights a week and it only costs Rs 200 per month (that would be £2.66) but best of all actually being able to get home from work at 6pm every night to make yoga class... heaven.

Living in India, it's as easy as...

ABC... (almost)

A is for Accommodation – our quest goes on. Or should I say our Mission Impossible. Finding a flat in Delhi should definitely become a task on The Apprentice. We are now in Week 3 and have seen around 30+ places. The VSO mantra of flexibility and adaptability has been chanted repeatedly. We’ve been as flexible as the Chinese Olympic gymnastic squad, yet still the property gods deny us permanent accommodation. There is a slim to anorexic chance we may sign a lease tomorrow – based on previous experiences I’m not optimistic. On the positive side we have now moved to Temporary Accommodation #2 – and it’s a definite upgrade. The luxury of double beds, clean sheets and a TV is keeping our Positivity Rainbow shining!

B is for Brokers – to become a property broker in India you don’t need a qualification. You mainly need a mobile phone, motorbike/tinted windows on your car, hair gel and selection of faux diamond earrings. In desperation, we have been pimping our need for a flat across town. I have so many broker numbers in my phone that I could set up a broker’s union. The pinnacle of our search arrived earlier in the week when we turned up to view a property to be greeted by 4 guys on motorbikes. Word was out that 2 blondies were on the look out and in turn, we were the hot property.

By Day 2 they had upgraded to a Black Toyota Corolla with tinted windows, to drive us around in. By the end of the day we had been invited to a wedding, nightclubbing and our marriage status had been dully assessed. By Day 3 we thought they were dodgy so we went out with another broker. We avoided the Wide Boys for most of the day (pretty hard when you are the only white girls in the village...) then our luck was out and a Broker Face Off ensued. We both turned up at the same property, at the same time. Hiding behind the tinted windows of Broker #2 car, they approached us and we had to get out to advise them our relationship was over. All was resolved amicably between the brokers, I think the Wide Boys were more distressed there would be no opportunity for joining us in the Jacuzzi they had promised to find us in our dream property...!

C is for Cheese – one of the highlights of this week has been dairy based. Don’t get me wrong I love the curry. I will happily eat it every day but at times you just want a taste of home; red wine, decent chocolate and cheese. So there was great excitement between the volunteers when we heard one of the VSO staff’s partner was flying over from London with a suitcase of cheese. Just in time for a Christmas party on Saturday night. I cannot describe the atmosphere at the party. Eye contact and conversation was limited until the full spread was laid out. Buffet etiquette went out the window, we attacked the cheese like a wild pack of hyenas on heat. It was so good.

Highlights: Eating at least one ice cream based dish a day to keep our spirits up during house hunting (bring on the heat so I can justify eating two I say), being able to say in Hindi ‘chai without sugar’ to avoid my teeth rotting by January, Christmas Day menu planning (there’s rumours of buying a BBQ goat if we can’t get turkey – there goes the vegetarian vow...) finding a bottle of gin for only 100 rupees that doesn’t make you go blind (we’ve only had one bottle, not sure the effect of a few yet...)

Rubbish, rallying and real estate...

This week has been all about the 3Rs...

1. Rubbish – to celebrate International Volunteer Day on Saturday we all went off to (one of) the smelliest parts of the Yamuna River to help clean it up. Keen as a button we trooped off the coach in our matching ‘I’m a volunteer’ t-shirts to be greeted by one very big stench. The morning mist that was rolling off the river actually turned out to be pure methane gas. The river literally bubbles away like a witch’s brew. More gas get’s released as you start picking embedded rubbish out of the bank. Donning thin blue plastic gloves we got digging and then got papped. The national press were down in full force snapping away and I think as the token Europeans (and blondes!) we were hot property. Much to my ego’s joy, Lucy (a fellow volunteer) and I, made Page 5 of The Sunday Express - a half page pic under the title ‘The Muck Stops Here’... I don’t know if the heading is a compliment or if my modelling career is now only limited to rubber gloves and cleaning products but a fun day was had by all!

2. Rallying – onto another important day, on Wednesday to mark International Disability Day we went down to an organised peaceful rally by India Gate. India Gate is an impressive landmark, an imitation Arc du Triomphe. Against the backdrop around 2,000 supporters turned up. The majority were from the deaf community, it was fascinating to watch such a lively group so well represented and to watch my roommate Jen signing so fluently. We could not understand why there was limited representation from other areas of the disabled community. As disability is such a taboo and seen as shameful we realised mobility was a huge issue and many people would be unable to leave the house to do basic things let alone afford transport to the event.

3. Real Estate – the trials and tribulations carries on with our endless search for our dream pad. We are up to flat viewing #21 which is very painful. Delhi is notorious for being very difficult to find decent accommodation. We lost a lovely flat earlier in the week and just trying to see it as fate, so fingers crossed that the Property Gods decide to smile down on us in the next few days, I’m very keen to start work and get some routine in my life now. I think one of the reasons you do VSO is to escape the mundane routine of life at home, but it’s made me realised having a home is so important – so cross fingers and toes and hopefully by next week we will be moving in somewhere!

Highlights: keeping a sense of humour at all times particularly when house hunting ( I think if I need to have a second career as a film location scout for dodgy flats I already have enough locations on my books), finally getting rid of my cold (the change in temperature from day to night by about 20 degrees does not help fight the bugs), afternoon tea with fellow volunteers (particularly home baked scones), enjoying meat and fish (breaking my vegetarian vow at the VSO party on Saturday night was worth it – the craving for steak has started...) starting to sleep through the noise (only needing ear plugs for 50% of the night is giving me hope for a full night’s sleep soon), messing about by the river (it was great to be finally doing what I am here to do and be up on a Saturday morning volunteering, doing a bit for the planet and my media profile of course!).